Your Husband May Be Cheating on You
It is very difficult for anybody in a relationship to admit that things are not right. The first signs of deception are often ignored in the hopes that it will all go away and things will just go back to the way they were. With time, we are forced to face the truth. What comes next is a pattern of blame and hurt that is common to most couples in this situation. We start looking at ourselves to find the reasons why our partners cheated. Instead of looking for answers in their behavior, we tend to search for faults within ourselves to justify someone else’s wrong doing. The interesting thing is that we tend to blame others first for most of the behaviors we perceive as wrong but when it comes to cheating it always falls into the same pattern: ” It’s because I’m too fat, too old…..”.
Most cheaters give plenty of signs that something has changed. We ignore them because we don’t want to face the change and admit that what we thought as secure might not be even there tomorrow. These are simple signs that catch our attention for a minute but are quickly thrown to the back of our minds. When partners come home from work and take extra care with their cell phones when before they couldn’t even remember to charge them, something has changed. When they take to the habit of excessive showering when clearly it wasn’t the case before, something has changed. Sleeping part of the night on the couch for no apparent reason also indicates that something is not the same.
While other factors can contribute to some of these behaviors, they often are signs of deception. It is easier to confront a partner as soon as these signs are present because the longer we wait the more excuses we create. Instead of creating excuses we should first face the facts and agree that is not our fault when a partner decides to cheat. Chances are, we are not even part of their decision. Once they take the first step, the blame falls in their hands and therefore should be dealt with accordingly.